Everyday is an Adventure. Embrace it

Posts tagged ‘Mothers Day’

The Mother’s Day Thief

This Mother’s Day I really want to warn everyone about a thief running rapidly through families and obviously never satisfied with its heist. One that cannot be caught or stopped. It snuck in so slowly, none of us noticed. It was hidden in the normal aging process and we didn’t see it. Shrouded in forgetfulness of the ordinary and cloaked by the everyday stresses that we thought clogged her mind. The Alzheimer’s thief is slick, it’ll slide right by you and you don’t even see it coming. Its cruel and unforgiving nature robs many special moments from the mind of the great. It’s been around for a very long time, taking as it pleases and never giving back.

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It reduces the great person that was and steals their thoughts. There is no sheriff to run it out of town nor warrant for its arrest. There is no way to stop it! It catches its victims off guard and like a parasite, leaches onto them and won’t let go. It wraps its crusty hands around the mind of the unknowing gently at first – so it’s not noticeable. Then over time, it tightens its grip until it has its grubby fingers in every crack and crevasse available.

An abomination… this disease is not satisfied with just daily forgetfulness. Oh no, it is the epitome of selfishness. It wants all memory, not just the daily or in-the-moment ones. It snatches them all until it has taken even the oldest and most dear. It steals what we hold close to our hearts and leaves a breadcrumb of who the person once was.

I hate it.

I took my mother for granite for almost 30 years before suddenly, I understood her. We were finally able to share with each other and have conversations without argument. My heart gushed over with love for her and I began to confide in her more. I began to trust her a way I never could as a child. I finally understood her love for me and the reasons behind many of the things that she did. I had to have children myself before I truly appreciated her and then suddenly – she is leaving me? The horrible, selfish, hateful, nasty, unnecessary and under imagined disease it stealing my Momma and I feel like I just met her a few short years ago.

It’s not fair, but then….when is life fair? I spent too much time wasted, not understanding her in this life. I have violated my personal life motto: Everyday is an adventure. Embrace it. I waited too long to embrace her and now she is leaving me…she is leaving daddy…she is leaving us all 😦 The last week I have spent in tears while my husband is away. I am ashamed that I am filled with so much regret that is self-inflicted by my own immature and stubborn mind of too many years.

I am glad we had the time we did get to enjoy each other. I still have Mom from time to time. She wiggles free from the grip of her oppressive thief and I suck up every available moment I can. Every tiny moment of that time is engraved in my memory and it is wrapped in so many emotions – hopefully even if this thief comes for me, I will fight it long and hard. I hate you Alzheimer Disease! I hate you!!

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Family, Love, Thoughts

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Becoming a Mom

Bruner Boys That moment you realize you are a Mom!

How to describe that moment? That moment when it hits you, when it all comes down like a ton of bricks and reality steps right in your face – You’re a Mom, a Mother, the one trusted source of information about vomit, diarrhea, diaper rash & common illnesses.

Not during pregnancy, although many women experience revelation then, but when that young one is in your arms. That’s when it’s real. That moment when the mental connection is made. I’ve heard some say it was in the hospital it hit them, but not for me. Oh no, it was after I got home. Suddenly, I realized how helpful the hospital staff had been during the first couple of days. They didn’t come home with me. There was no help really!

Nothing prepares you for it – not books, movies, seminars, or pregnancy classes. Nope, no stories you hear or conversations will prepare you for the inevitable; that fateful moment that suddenly shakes your inner being like a banana tree.

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It can happen multiple times, through multiple ages of the child’s life, and can be as small as a thought or as profound as a huge chilling emotion sweeping over you. You know, the one that takes your breath away and leave you feeling shell-shocked? Yep, that’s the one I’m writing about.

For me, the pregnancy was not it. Not with my first-born anyway. Not carrying him, not the short easy labor, not even the nurses bringing him to me created the reality that I had entered into the everlasting realm of motherhood. Nope. I carried on as though completing a task. Like getting from point A to point B. I marked off the mile markers as I went until one day, when he was about 3 weeks old, it hit me.

I was laying in bed with him beside me nursing. He was making little sounds. He was so relaxed. It was like he trusted me already and didn’t even know me. He looked up at me with his little eyes full of love as his little hand patted my arm. BOOM! Right there, right then I realized I was a Mom. I started to cry. Emotions swept over me like an avalanche and I was completely consumed. 20 years later I can still feel that same love & emotions sweep over me when he calls.

Chrissy +Nicky

Then a couple of years later, my life replayed the previous 2 years. I was pregnant again with another boy. I thought man, I got this! I mean, I had already been there, done that, got the t-shirt!

Nope, it all hit me again. He was about 6 days old…my oldest was laying beside me & new baby was in my arms. We were home. I realized this was a forever gig. And I realized that although I didn’t apply for the position, I knew it was meant to be 🙂

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Here they are today. Those 2 babies grew up and they’re so much bigger than me. My biggest fear, the one I wrestled with the most with throughout their infancy & toddler years – never came true (PRAISE GOD).

My biological mother gave me away. She didn’t want me. Her biological mother gave her away. She wasn’t wanted either. All the women in my biological family seemingly did the same thing. I don’t want to be like that. Please Jesus, please don’t let me do it. No matter what comes, keep my mind strong. Keep me fiercely independent and protect my mental state. Please, please, please!!

God is merciful. I kept them…plus 2 girls and another boy God sent me. 🙂

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Family, Love, Smiling, Thoughts

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100 Reasons Why You Should Call Your Mom

100 Reasons Why You Should Call Your Mom… No, really – call her!

I know the drill, I’ve done it myself. It’s been a while since you spoke to your mom (or accepted one of her calls) so you are thinking…maybe, just maybe – you should call her? YES, you should… and here are 100 reasons why!

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1. She is your mother for better or for worse.
2. She did the best she could at the time and she always wished it was better.
3. She thinks about you every time she sees someone your age.
4. She misses you dearly
5. She likes to see and hear about your successes.
6. She is your biggest fan.
7. She thinks about you every time she speaks with someone on the phone that talks the way you do.
8. Although you are human, you can do no wrong.
9. She is proud of your accomplishments. Even the little ones that you don’t even remember.
10. She loves you.
11. You took up residence in her body for almost a year without paying rent or helping buy groceries!
12. You were the apple of her eye.
13. She was your primary dietician during your formative years.
14. She put off things she wanted to do, so she could spend time with you.
15. She bought you that article of clothing you were dying for instead of going to the dentist to have her teeth worked on.
16. She always fed you. Even if she was hungry after supper, she made sure you were full & happy.
17. She cleaned up your vomit & probably didn’t complain.
18. She held you tight when you were sick and sat up with you all night. Although she knew she would catch your illness, she did it to comfort you.
19. She always dressed you first and didn’t take much time for herself.
20. You were her world…and probably still are.
21. When you broke something, she took the fall for it.
22. She stood between you and many butt-bustings. She was your shield.
23. Your mother is the only woman in your life that will never judge you for being you.
24. She may be spastic at times, but she handled all your crisis Like-a-Boss.
25. She would improvise when you ate her office work…or peed on it.
26. Your Mother protected you from sharp objects.
27. She cuddled and reassured you when you were sad.
28. When you were lonely, she was your friend.
29. She protected you from the boogie man & the zombie’s in the walls.
30. When you are hurting, her heart is breaking.
31. She celebrated all your tiny victories.
32. She celebrated your big Victories
33. Your Mom gave you breathe and you took hers away
34. Your hopes were her aspirations for you
35. She fixed your favorite foods often to make you happy.
36. Your dreams were her goals
37. She paved the way for your success.
38. She worked to help you in school and then came home and worked there.
39. Your mom encouraged others to see the best in you, even when you were at your worst.
40. She may not have kept the house immaculate, but she made sure your clothes were always clean.
41. She skipped naps while watching you sleep.
42. Your Momma gave it everything she had!
43. She tried to dazzle your friends to make you cool.
44. She liked your music even when it gave her a headache.
45. She baked your favorite sweets to make you happy.
46. She told every teacher that doubted you where they could go!
47. She stayed awake to make sure you were breathing.
48. Your Mother stayed up late at night worrying about you.
49. She called everyone she knew to track you down when you were late coming home.
50. Moms have a special heart given by God. Her heart misses you.
51. She sees you with eyes of confidence.
52. Her arms are always ready to hug you.
53. She’s always waiting on your call.
54. She watches he driveway…incase you might drive up.
55. Even though she may disagree, she will take your side.
56. She removed gum from your hair patiently.
57. She cleaned the stains out of your underwear!
58. She would suffer a million calamities for you.
59. She has patience with you.
60. Your Mother was purposely objective to your mate for your emotional safety.
61. Your children are her crown in life.
62. She loves your pets like your children if you do not have any.
63. Her life was put on hold to raise you, and she never regretted it.
64. She delights in your career and brags on you regularly to her friends.
65. She prays for you all the time.
66. When she shops, she thinks of things that you need or would like.
67. She celebrates your birthday more so than you do!
68. Your Momma remembers how tiny your hands were.
69. She is always lighting a candle for your life.
70. She knows your vulnerabilities and keeps them safely secret.
71. Her hips are slightly off-center because she held you so much while you were young.
72. A mom never forgets the time you only wanted her to comfort you.
73. She is a fixer – always striving to help you fix something.
74. Mothers come in many forms – not all biological!
75. Even if she wasn’t really your mom, but just a lady you looked to like-a-mom, she knows that and never forgot.
76. God changes the mind of a Mother. This is why you think she is a little crazy.
77. One day, she will not be there to answer the phone.
78. A day may come when she doesn’t remember who you are.
79. There may be a day that she can no longer speak verbally.
80. She has carried the weight of every tiny thing she could have done better on her shoulders.
81. She remembers every single mistake she made – and is hard on herself.
82. You can release her from the Mother-Guilt she carries.
83. She is a strong woman your mate should look up to.
84. Every little wrinkle on her face she wears as a trophy from your childhood.
85. Each gray hair on her head is a reminder for her of what she once was to you.
86. She sees herself in your face.
87. She realizes when she has gone too far.
88. Your Mom knows when she should stay silent, but can’t help herself.
89. She invested her entire life into you.
90. She still dreams about when you where a toddler.
91. Her mind races with thoughts about how you are.
92. She still wants to help you.
93. Her life was forever changed by you.
94. Her thoughts were forever changed by you.
95. You made her stronger than she thought she could be.
96. She feeds off your energy and thriving life.
97. Every busted vein in her legs is a sign of her love – walking the floor with you while you were a fussy baby.
98. She never regretted you!
99. You were not an accident.
100. You make her the happiest woman alive when you call!!

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Adventures, Family, Love, Thoughts

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Mother’s Day Gifts 2017

You’re a mom, so what do you really want for Mother’s Day?

You know your kids (and maybe even your husband) are doing internet searches on what to get you. Will those searches return answers that really fit you? Will they remember something you said you liked several years back? Does it even matter? Are you one of the mothers that finds delight in emotion rather than material objects?

I am one of those matronly mothers now and I don’t feel like Mother’s Day really applies to me this year. I am still a mom, but the kids are all grown and on their own. Sometimes I am really excited when I think about the fact that I am an “empty-nester”. It is in these glorious years when you get your life back. You can finally cater to yourself and your spouse. It’s the time for creating new memories and living again before your health fails or you can’t get around as well anymore. I should be happy, right?

Mother’s Day 2017 has me thinking about how blessed I was to raise boys….a lot of them. The blessings continued with some beautiful girls the Lord allowed me to have for a bit too. Everyone is grown now though and none of them need me. Isn’t that the biggest part of being a Mom? Everyone needs you! You are the rock.

I found several great websites with many Mother’s Day gift suggestions straight from the intellectual minds of Moms. Many of them make so many wonderful suggestions, but I find myself just wishing I could be with the kids this year. I long for a day with all the kids together at one time. I wish I could hug them all at once (although my arms are way to short for that).

Anyway, please enjoy the recommended Mother’s Day gifting solution below:

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Adventures, Family, Thoughts

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Momma-tude

Momma-tude is the attitude of a Mother. This Mom attitude is not one to be ashamed of but rather one to be admired. But, what exactly is a Mother’s attitude? It’s part of her personality. It makes her who she is. It helps define her in her everyday life. Momma-tude is also a common reaction or feeling amongst a group of Mom’s. There are many types. Which one are you?

Which Momma-tude are you?

The Accident waiting to happen Mom

Common phrases:

Please stop crying before you drown in your tears.
Get down from there before you fall off and break your neck.
You know, chewing with your mouth closed prevents lock-jaw.
You’re going to end up in the same type of trouble when you get older if you don’t learn from your brother.
Don’t touch it. You don’t know where that’s been.
This place is full of germs.
Talk like that will get you arrested.
Don’t try it…
Foods ready. Come on everyone. It’s time to gain 10 lbs!
That’s not a toy. Put that thing away for the next 20 years!
What were you thinking?
You are going to cause a nose bleed
Just think about how bad that could have been

The Over-Protective Mom

Common phrase:

Oh honey, stop crying before you bust a blood vessel.
(Catches mischievous toddler immediately as he begins to fall off counter.) How did you get up there this time? One day you’re going to kill yourself.
You will choke if you chew with your mouth open.
I need you to go to your room for your own safety.
Ew, do you know how many bacteria is on the bottom of those feet?
You don’t know who touched that before you.
I know you didn’t just say what I thought you said.
That’ll kill you…
Eat. You need your strength
That’s not to touch.
You obviously weren’t thinking
(Finger in nose) EW! *Squirts hand sanitizer on her hands first, then child’s.
I’m gonna show you what I mean in a minute

The Sarcastic Mom

Common Phrases:

Is that the loudest you can cry? Give it up.
Climbing on the counter again? How’d that work out for ya last time?
I don’t always need to see what your food looks like when you chew.
Do you think you can raise your brother better than me?
Keep that little footsie to yourself.
Great, now you probably have staph.
Really? Really!
Go ahead, see what happens…
You don’t like to eat green beans? Well I don’t like to see you pick your nose at the table.
What are you planning on doing with that?
You really thought that would work?
Digging for gold?
I’m going to knock you into next week if you don’t stop

The Emotional Mom

Common phrases:

*Sees baby crying & cries along*.
(See toddler climbing on counter) Quickly swoops baby up and hysterically says, “you could have died!”
I remember when you were first beginning to eat solid food.
I don’t know where I went wrong. (cries)
Don’t you love each other?
When you were a baby, you touched everything.
After everything I’ve done for you, I can’t believe you said that.
P l e a s e don’t
I made one of everyone’s favorite food!
You are too young to be doing that.
I’m praying for you child.
You are embarrassing me
I can’t take this anymore

The in-yo-face Mom

Common phrases:

Keep crying and I’ll give you something to cry about!
You’ve been warned. You are not a monkey!
Could you chew any louder?
Do you want to be punished too? No? Then stay out of it!
You think you’re a bully? Try that on me.
Did you see a sign that said Touch Me?
Oh no you didn’t just say that.
I mean it!!
Eat what I cooked or be hungry.
Take your hands out of your pants!
Use your head for something other than a hat rack.
Do you want your friends to call you a booger picker?
Don’t make me jap slap you

The Strict Mom

Common phrases:

(Baby begins to cry) Zip it!
(See Toddler climbing on counter) Time out!
If you can’t chew with your mouth closed, go to our room.
Go to your room. You are both grounded now.
No Wi-Fi. Go to your room.
Stop it.
I heard that!
No.
Let me see your hands. GO wash them again with Soap this time.
Stop…no really, STOP!
The next time you think of something like that, just don’t.
(Smacks hand of booger picker) No
oh…Oh…OH!! You’ve been warned

The Proper Mom

Common phrases:

It’s okay to cry as long as you wipe each tear independently and before it has been on your cheek more than one minute.
Our feet go on the ground.
We chew with our mouths closed.
Your interference was not requested to discipline your brother.
Keep your hands and feet to yourself.
You look with your eyes, not with your hands.
(Ignores anything child says that she is not proud of)
We mustn’t do that
Sit up straight. Don’t slouch at the table.
I am ignoring what you are doing.
Think before you act.
My child doesn’t do that.
Surely you didn’t just do that

The Extremely Religious Mom

Common phrases:

Lawd help, that baby can feel the spirit!
For Heaven’s sake, please stop climbing. I’m going to pray about this.
Did you pray before you started eating?
Honor your Mother and Father.
Turn the other cheek.
You better be asking for forgiveness if you touched that.
(Shocked) You kiss me with that mouth!
You’ll need to pray about that before you do it
Speak when spoken to.
You are going to go blind.
I pray the Lord will be your conscience.
God sees everything.
I’m praying for you

The Hypochondriac Mom

Common phrases:

(baby crying) Please stop crying before you get another ear infection!
Ahhhhh! You could’ve broken a bone!!
I hope you don’t chip a tooth chewing like that.
It’s not emotional healthy for you to interfere in your brother’s punishment.
Stop. One of you will bruise.
Quick!! Wash your hands!!!!
Great!!! You said it.
Stop before you die
Did you wash your hands?
Go wash your hands!
You didn’t think this through, did you?
Get your finger out of your nose, do you even remember where it’s been?
You could’ve been killed

The Everybody’s Mother

Common phrases:

(crying child) Oh, come here baby…you need a hug.
Get down (said with BIG eyes).
It’s rude to chew with your mouth open. (said with a smile)
Best stay out of it.
I don’t want to see that again.
Did I just see you touch that?
You want to repeat what you just said?
I wouldn’t do that if I were you….
Eat supper with us 🙂 Sit down. Now!
What are you expecting to find down there?
Next time, you may want to think about it before doing it.
Need a tissue?
Not good

The Gentle Mother

Common phrases:

(Child crying) Oh honey, it’s not that bad. I love you!
Gently sweeps child off counter and to the floor- Be careful darling.
Close your mouth to chew sweetheart.
Although it takes a village to raise a child, I am doing just fine.
Hands are for hugging, not for hitting.
Now now, we must not touch.
I’m sure you don’t mean that.
Stop. Please don’t.
I hope you like what I made.
Could you go do that in your room?
Your mind is powerful. Think before you speak or act.
(Hands tissue) Blow your nose.
Oh no. I can’t believe you would do that.

The Frustrated Mother

Common phrases:

You think crying will save you?
(Toddler climbing on counter) Squeezes eyes closed then back open. Hand on hip. Get DOWN.
Ew, close your mouth to chew. I don’t want to see that!
I don’t need your help parenting your brother!
If you make me get up, it’s going to be 100x worse for you.
Good grief, if you don’t stop touching everything, we are going to get kicked out of here!
Did you just say that?
I’m serious as a heart attack!
You MUST wear pants to the table.
Stop playing with your p*nis
What were you thinking? Oh wait, you weren’t!
Stop eating your boogers!
You are going to wish you never did that

No matter which you identify with the most, you are still a mom and probably under appreciated a bit. Here’s to all the Mommas out there.

Happy Mother’s Day!!

***Special Thanks to my friends who gave me some of this golden material. I love you, you hot Mommas!

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Family, Love, Smiling, Thoughts

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Mother’s Day list Success 2013

I was so bummed out yesterday thinking about how much I love my kids & husband, how special they are, & how they weren’t even thinking about Mother’s Day coming up. I knew I’d made my list & posted it everywhere I thought they may see it, but I just didn’t see that it was doing any good 😦 This bag of trash sat in a very obvious place for 16 1/2 hours as I counted 37 trips they made back & forth past it 😦

I woke up this morning and discovered I was alone. Odd. I filled up a cup of coffee & came back to the bedroom. Shortly afterwards my husband came through the door with breakfast & a large hazelnut latte! 🙂

Soon after I ate a few bites my husband comes in & says, “Chrissy come with me. I’m fed up with these boys. Please, just…come to the kitchen.” Sadly I followed him thinking there would be a new sticky mess somewhere. 😦
This is what I saw 🙂

All 3 boys were standing there 🙂 I got a hug from each one!
I came back to eat my breakfast. After a few more bites Nick said to come outside…

*Gasp* The car was clean!!!

**Oh!!!** 🙂 🙂 I wish these were scratch-N-sniff pictures because it smells so good. You’d never know I taxi sweaty teenagers around 6 days a week!!! 🙂 🙂

I’m in heaven!! It took him over 2 hours to clean out the car, vacuum it, & organize the trunk! He said the boys helped get their things out, but he couldn’t believe how much crap was tucked in & under places in the car. (Sounds about right!) He lectured the kids for me and definitely feels my pain.

Next, was the new flower garden 🙂 Everyone participated. They dug holes for me, helped me weed & even decorate. I’m now the proud owner of a sea shell garden only 200-250 miles away from the beach 🙂

I’m one happy Momma!
Happy Mother’s Day everyone!!! 🙂

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Adventures, Family, Love, Smiling, Thoughts

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Mother’s Day Gift Ideas

Mother’s day is just around the corner and I would like to do something different this year than last. Cruising around several blogs today I read several articles about gift ideas for Mother’s Day. I really agreed somewhat with these authors, yet I wanted somethings a tad different from my family.

I hope to spread inspiration in the form of inexpensive gift giving ideas that I promise will hit a home run (well…with me anyway)! Last year for mother’s day I wrote an ode to my mom. (If you missed it, you can catch up here .)

I always feel guilty around Mother’s Day for several reasons. One – I don’t think I’ve been a good daughter for my still living mother. Two – my birthday was less than a month ago. Having a late April birthday never bothered me until 17 years ago when I became a mother. I feel like there is too much cost involved in me existing during the Spring months.

Anyway, because I am frugal minded and have a conscience, I would like to offer up some inexpensive and easy gift ideas for all the kiddos and hubbys out there (mainly mine)!

Here are a few things I certainly would love (hint hint):

- Tell your Mom you love her – in person! Never send a Happy Mother’s day message to her through email, text, phone call, or voice mail. A good ole fashioned hug around her tired and worn neck, plus a whispered I love you Mom goes a long way.
- Take out the trash – without asking for a trophy for doing so. Mom sees everything you do. There is no need to point out what you have done for her 😉
- Mop the floor for her
  – Hasn’t she spent enough time on her hands and knees scrubbing your muddy shoe prints, spilled drinks, food crumbs, and other unmentionable sticky residue?
- Clean out her car!! Kids, you know every piece of paper, empty water bottle, broken object, and chewed on plastic “hidden” in the car. You also know how long you’ve been watching that one lonely french fry you threw slowly harden in the back window. Make your mother the happiest woman in the world and clean up after yourself! (Without being reminded or asked.) Clean your finger prints off her windows so she can safely drive at night and sneakily vacuum her carpets.
- Buy Mom some air fresheners for the car. Hubby and children, when mom shuttles you to and from sports, workouts, and competitions – where do you think your sweat goes as your back and butt magically dry on the way home? In the car seats….**shudder…Ew! If you are the sweaty culprit, perhaps it would be a nice gesture to clean mom’s upholstery for her or simply buy her an air freshener for her car.
- For one day, offer in a home-made card to refrain from asking for anything from your mother. Don’t ask her to find anyone or thing for you, what time your next game is, if anyone can spend the night, where any objects are located, the next designated time for the refrigerator to regenerate missing food, to cook you anything, which shirt looks better, to feed your dog, to discuss the unfair issues around current school discipline, or when the magic body wash fairy will return because you are out. …Just for one day, please?
- Make her brownies and keep your hands out of them 🙂
- Tell her she is beautiful. Every mother is beautiful and probably doesn’t hear it enough.

Bonus: For 1 day, avoid drinking milk straight from the container & don’t lick the syrup 😦

Let her drink coffee all day! Don’t judge her. After all, she’s raising you or yours, right?
Mow the yard for her without a congressional meeting to convince you to do so.
Offer to help her pick weeds out of her flower garden 🙂
Offer to dig a hole for her to plant more flowers. This one is so easy guys.- Is it going to take much time or effort to dig a hole?
Ask her to take a walk with you. Sometimes mom’s are so busy doing all the little things that she forgets to take a relaxing walk. If your mom is young, hip, or into exercise – run with her!

Whatever you do, don’t buy her chocolate. You know she can’t resist that stuff and there’s a beach vacation coming up soon.

Please enjoy some of these other great articles about Mother’s Day gift giving as well that I’ve found: WriterMom’s Blog, Oulaw Mama,

And these are just plain inspirational 🙂

***(My apologies to everyone about the odd font that appears here. Some of your blogs names are totally copy/paste-able…others, well not so much. So, I have a funky font thing going on)

jokondotnet

Maia Madden

Eccentric Chai

Kirsten Joy Awake

Beyond the Bounds of Bipolar

Finder of Lost Things

Especially Made

Imperfectly Balanced

The Farmer’s Wife

Delana’s World

A Modern Day Anna

Generation W

Was that supposed to Crunch?!

Surprisemama

One in 36 Million

Having Kids Ruined My Life

Story & History

Mother’s Day Prayer for Moms in Every Season of Motherhood

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The Sport of Motherhood!

The definition of a Mother in my mind is a selfless, patient, observant, willful woman whom loves children; not just the fruit of her womb, but all. I get my definition of Mother from my mom’s example in life.

There are no classes to enroll in that prepares a woman for motherhood. There’s no fancy degree awarded once this position has been granted. There are levels that can be achieved, but there is no Final Exam, EOC, or ECA.

Here’s my version of motherhood:
LEVEL 1 (Preparation): mental roller coaster. Begins with conception. Part 1 First Trimester – either begins in absolute bliss & gratitude or anger & frustration with the male involved in the act.
Part 2 Second Trimester – acceptance and love. Love being pregnant. Loves the baby. Accepted the “baby shape” her body took on.
Part 3 Third Trimester – ends in absolute bliss & gratitude or anger & frustration with the male involved in the act.

LEVEL 2 (Trial Run, warm-up, Beta phase)
This level is inevitable. All new mom’s know everything, yet know nothing. Receiving unsolicited advice not acceptable, yet asking questions is. During this test run, babies are accidentally scratched, bumped, diapered too loosely or tightly, baby poops on the last clean outfit & is destined to hang out in the buff cutely, formula is mixed wrong, the blanket is forgotten in Spring/Autumn/Winter, and the bottle runs out before mom makes it back home for more. (Not everyone breastfeeds.) During all events, mom looks around to determine if anyone saw her & is deeply embarrassed even though each oops is private & unnoticed! She learns from each mistake and grows.

LEVEL 3 (Dentistry & Theater)
During this level, use of recently acquired cry decoding skills are tested. Mom may think she’s failing. Baby needs mom – clingy yet squirms when held. Many new acts & scenes are created to satisfy baby. New voices, faces, dancing & twirling, musicals are performed. Accents are developed & mom begins to speak baby to adults unknowingly. Once the culprit is discovered (evidence of tooth or fever, unsolicited advice is given, or grandma steps in) mom is determined to help the teeth make an entrance! Many dental therapies are attempted (gels, ice, rags, toys, massage, pacifier, etc). After 1st & 3rd tooth arrive, mom’s an expert!

LEVEL 4 (Case Study/Analytics)
Testing commences on food studies. New cereals/foods are introduced. Gag reflexes are studied and results are documented and shared. During Pediatric check-up results are proudly delivered. Poop Analytics begin. More unsolicited advice is administered.

LEVEL 5 (Olympic Training)
Several new sports are mastered.
A. One hand hip hoist – picking up baby from floor with one hand free
B. Hurdels – running & jumping from one side of the house to the other while jumping gates, toys, or sippy cups to reach baby just in time before certain disaster.
C. Diaper Dash – changing diaper quickly in public before anyone notices…or smells it.
D. Clean Sweep – leaping, running, crouching, and reaching quickly to tidy the house when unexpected company or guests arrive
E. Spelunking – skill of saving baby from heights (cabinets, refrigerator, tables, stairs, or banisters at incredible speeds
F. CrossCountry Running – Running at gravity defying speeds to catching baby across a yard, field, park, or grocery/retail store.
G. Geocaching – locating a sippy cup/pacifier when dropped or thrown into a field, thicket of brush, driveway, park landscape, or retail store dump bin of merchandise.

LEVEL 6 (Literature and Audiology)
Reading to toddler. Teaching new words & phrases. Baby learns to mock & repeat…everything. Embarrassing and unsolicited phrases acquired from other children & family members. Baby repeats said phrases in public or church. Mom buffers impact, apologizes & corrects baby.

LEVEL 7 (Electrical Engineering)
Learns how to revive electrical devices after food, slobber, water, or impact damage. Items include VCR, DVR, DVD player, MP3, IPOD, cell phone, remote controls, PDA, etc)

LEVEL 8 (Gymnastic Floor Exercise)
Lego high stepping, lil green army men dodge, baby gate hopping, toy reach, baby swing, and toy ducking.

LEVEL 9 (Acceptance, Accolades & Admission)
This level occurs multiple times: Daycare, Preschool, Kindergarten, Middle School, High School, Driving, Graduation of any form, College, Engagement, Marraige, Grandchild announcement.

To sum it all up, mothers are a special breed of people. Any woman can morph into this status, if she is selfless.

Happy Mother’s Day Mommy! I love you 🙂

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Category:

friendship, Recovery, Smiling, Thoughts

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Everyday is an Adventure. Embrace it

Posts tagged ‘Mothers Day’

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No matter which you identify with the most, you are still a mom and probably under appreciated a bit. Here’s to all the Mommas out there.

Happy Mother’s Day!!

***Special Thanks to my friends who gave me some of this golden material. I love you, you hot Mommas!

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