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Posts tagged ‘healing’

Cancer Fundraiser for the Parker/Rogers Family

Scroll down the page to find the new contest for March 12th -March 20th!

This family’s young son was recently diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. I set up a fundraiser through Avon to help the family with their travel and medical expenses. I wish I could do so much more! The kids began tweeting about his illness using hashtag #PrayForTyler or #prayfortyler for a couple of months now. I know this family personally and they have been such a blessing to so many people in the community. They have reached out and supported others and now would be a great time for us to support them.

If you regularly order Avon, would you consider placing your order using this link for at least one order through the end of March?  I promise not to steal you away from your regular representative! Please use code TYLER21 during the checkout process so that the family receives all the profits. I am donating 100% of the profit to them. To see their fundraising progress, click on the “online event” tab.  http://www.youravon.com/cpolovich

Thanks in advance for having a big heart! ❤  :-)

NEWS UPDATE:

Every order placed online between today (March 6th, 2013) and Sunday (March 10th) will be entered into a drawing to receive a Pave Circle Necklace and earring Gift Set!!!
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Here’s how you can receive more entries after you place an order online using code TYLER21 at checkout ——

  • Place your order today and receive one entry when you use Code TYLER21 during the check out process!
  • Share this fundraiser to receive another entry after ordering!
  • Leave a comment below in the comment section telling me where you shared this cancer fundraiser and receive another entry!!
  • I will draw the winner’s name on March 11th and post the winner on all media sites (WordPress, Facebook, Twitter, Google+, etc.)

What are you waiting for? I have never asked anyone here to donate to anything. This is the first and I can guarantee this family will thank you! If your young son was fighting for his life, you’d hope that someone out there would pay it forward too 🙂 God has blessed so many of us. If you’ve been looking for a way to Pay it Forward and aren’t sure how to start, this is a great way to start.

If you can’t give, it’s understood and you will never be condemned for it by me in any way.  I love y’all to pieces 🙂

Blessing ❤

We have a winner!!!!!!!     Joeley Searle you are the WINNER of the Pave circle earrings and necklace! Please contact me so we can arrange delivery of your gift 🙂 If you didn’t win, please stay tuned: The next contest will be announced later today with another product.

New Contest for order placed from March 12th-March 20th 2013!

Every order placed online between today (March 12th, 2013) and Wednesday (March 20th) will be entered into a drawing to receive a giant bottle of SkinSoSoft Ultra Moisturizing body lotion 25.3 fl. oz.  I have 2 to give away during this period 🙂
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Here’s how you can receive more entries after you place an order online using code TYLER21 at checkout ——

  • Place your order today and receive one entry when you use Code TYLER21 during the check out process!
  • Share this fundraiser to receive another entry after ordering!
  • Leave a comment below in the comment section telling me where you shared this cancer fundraiser and receive another entry!!
  • I will draw the winner’s name on March 21th and post the winner on all media sites (WordPress, Facebook, Twitter, Google+, etc.)

Ready, set, order!

Holidays & Family 3yrs after Death

Grief is no easy monster to defeat & one of the biggest illusions it presents is how “family” holds together afterwards. Family unintentionally dissipates as the months & years go by. There are many good intentions and people are quick to declare, “we will not allow anything to separate us” and “we will get together more often”, but reality takes hold & people drift apart.

Death has a way of bringing people together & a way of separating them as well. The reasons why people drift apart are too numerous to mention, but the people who drift remain the same: Brothers, Sisters, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Friends, & especially in-laws.

The illusion of family is presented by those we love & share many years of memories, triumphs, & disappointments with. These are people we grew up with & other times people we allowed into our lives through love & devotion.

Probably some of the hardest lessons learned through this process is that people who were once “family” are no longer as the years go by. Those who once said “I love you” will allow themselves to fad out of your life & resume theirs without thought of the ones they leave out. The daily phone calls that occurred for 15 years will fade to weekly, then monthly, yearly, & finally stop completely. The thought of what constitutes family will be reduced to blood. The family events, get-togethers, & shared holidays will cease. The random encounters in town become fewer as the years accumulate.
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There is an awkwardness that begins to grow & soon in-laws feel betrayed by the widow/widower should they allow someone else into their life. Step children decide that a surviving step parent is no longer part of their family once another man/woman enters the widow/widower’s life. Distance becomes the norm instead of the unheard of and the unusual becomes usual.

  • During the 1st year after death, the holidays are mournful by all, yet comforting because “family” still gather and hold traditions.
  • By the 2nd year after death, holidays are a bit restrained. They seems to be full of pity and compassion for the widow/widower and the children. “Family” approach the holidays with caution.
  • By the 3rd year, the “family” turn inward. There is still much pity and compassion, but it is for themselves – not the surviving widow/widower. Since the phone calls have ceased, guilt money begins to arrive in mailboxes instead of invitations to holiday gatherings. “Family” begins to cling to each other more closely so they will be able to discuss the unacceptable changes in the widow/widower’s life. They fear change because they refuse to risk losing the precious memories of the loved one passed. I am hoping above all hope that one day soon, “family” will realize that nothing can replace or remove those memories from their minds.

In the mind of the “family”, it remains appropriate for the them to move on with their lives (as they should), yet it remains inappropriate for the widow/widower to resume life. Afterall, they have been encouraged to do so by many friends and loved ones, therefore it has become acceptable. This self acceptance takes a great deal of effort and can lead to the selfish human nature of self-preservation. People forget however, that self-preservation does not include tearing others down in the process. One of the most important Human impulses in life is self-preservation.

This holiday season, please try not to damage a survivor of any traumatic event by your own inclinations of self-preservation.  😦

Changes after Death

This particular article is difficult to write, but part of healing is sharing.
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Death is not easy on survivors, the friends of the deceased, or the survivors friends. We are nearing the 3 year mark after losing my husband, the kids’ father and embarking on the PTSD  journey.  It seems with each passing year, each family member affected by his death is still affected in a different way. It goes without saying that each person heals differently after experiencing a traumatic death in their lives. Some still carry very tender hearts and others just ignore that the date of the event on the calendar exists. Rarely does anyone speak of the actual event any longer. I have heard it said that time heals all wounds, but this is not the case for everyone. If someone brings him up, they mention him, not the event. This too is part of the healing process. I guess we are making progress after all 🙂
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Tragedy can bring people closer together and it can pull people far apart. After a period of time passes, many people tend to forget that there is no correct or incorrect way to grieve. There is no correct or incorrect length of time for someone to move on with life either. Moving on with life or “living” doesn’t mean that you have forgotten what you had, who that person was, or what they meant to you. Because this can be forgotten, some people in a family can turn against the ones that they feel like are not grieving appropriately in their minds. They begin to pass judgement. Along with judgment, comes bitterness, anger, and a complete re-visitation of the grieving process. The person who allows anger to fester inside of them experiences many sets backs from their healing.

Death is not prejudice. It takes who it pleases. Death is not questionable. It is final. Death is not arguable, it wins. It is uncaring, selfish, ugly, and can change people forever. Death can bring out the worst or the best in those around you while one grieves or while one heals. Death changes the image of people that we have in our minds. Death can use a person’s emotions again them. Death changes perception.

Children process death differently in their mind than a spouse, parent, or friend. After losing a parent, children want to see the surviving parent alone. They are unwilling to accept anyone else in the surviving parents life. Another woman will never be good enough. Another man will be unacceptable. Surviving children can be cruel because their emotions over take them. They will feel as though the surviving parent has fallen out of love with the deceased parent at some point, even if they remain alone for the rest of their lives. They will assume that the surviving parent is trying to replace the deceased if they choose to re-marry. They can harbor resentment, anger, and in some cases guilt because they like the new “parent” brought into their lives by the surviving parent.
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A death in the family can actually be quite dangerous to one’s emotional state & the unity of that family. Siblings will turn against Siblings. Mother against father or vice versa.  If everyone involved is not understanding of the other members of the family and their feelings, the family can be destroyed.

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A stroll in early Fall

What do you see?

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I see rebirth, a never ending promise of renewal.

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God provides for all.

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Thank you Lord for the path you put me on!
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PTSD & Deception = backward progress

The mind is a precious, tender, and special thing. When dealing with PTSD & Deception it can = backward progress. On Thanksgiving day, just before midnight, I received some devastating news. This news would affect more than just me personally, it would affect my boys, their sisters, and aggravate their PTSD.
I will not share the details of this news, as the news itself is not important. The type of news is the key point.

Deception, deceit, lies…

When a person is healing from PTSD, their mind is rerouting thought patterns, memories, perception of people, places, and things. This healing time is fragile and if lies, deceit, or deception enters…it could completely reverse the healing process.

If you are personally healing from PTSD you understand how important reality & the truth are. If you are standing along side someone healing through PTSD, you should NOT allow, implant, or produce deception, lies, or deceit in any situation.

The truth is always the best medicine. Sometimes, good people make bad decisions. Sometimes, bad people make good decisions. Sometimes, people good or bad assume that someone healing can’t handle the truth. This is completely false. The truth will help heal and benefit someone struggling with PTSD. The truth is not always pretty, fun, or joyously delivered. But, the truth is always the best choice!

If you choose to be that solid foundation, that rock for the healing person to lean on, you must do it truthfully.  If you do not… PTSD & Deception = backward progress 😦

God has held my boys & I in his gentle loving hands and protected us for many years. The day I received the news of a year & half of deception…My God was there to catch us when we were weak kneed and almost fell backwards.

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