Everyday is an Adventure. Embrace it

Posts tagged ‘post concussion syndrome’

What Are You Looking At?

Yesterday, after school, we attended a football parent meeting. It was a mandatory meeting for all players in all grades of the High School and was very informative. Since we have 3 boys attending (1 played last year & 2 will play in the Fall) we never thought a thing about attending.

It was a good meeting – very informative. I’m new to this whole kid playing sports thing because X & Z never played any sports in the past, but Y who came to live with us a year ago has played sports his whole life. All I knew of sports from last season was the the endless shuttling of kids from one location to the next, sitting in the stands and washing uniforms. Y moved in with us in the spring and just joined right in with the existing football team, so we missed any and all parental information meetings last season. Shoot, we never received any communications from the coaches or anyone else except Y. This year is different.

Anyway, after the meeting was a “cook out” which consisted of hot dogs wrapped in aluminum foil, tiny bags of chips, water, and cookies. There was no seating, so we all just stood around and snacked off paper plates and looked around at the other people, kids, coaches, etc. interacting or just standing around like we were.

I noticed several “clicks” or grouping of people that must have known each other from the previous years. My husband hasn’t lived here long, so knew no one really, but I have lived here my whole life. I went to this school. I saw a few people that I knew. And surprisingly something happened.

Memories!

Since hitting my head a while back and losing a ton of memories, I get super happy when some return! They were pretty happy memories too. I remembered the wings/halls of the school (which classes were where) and began to remember some happy, funny, or eventful events that occurred πŸ™‚

I guess I was kind of zoning out after a few minutes because I suddenly realized my husband was talking to me. Listening intently, I tried to catch up on his conversation when I noticed over his shoulder that a group of women standing behind him were staring at us. There were 4 women in this group. The one in the front was covering her mouth and she spoke to the other ladies as she cut her eyes toward us. At several times our eyes met and locked on each other as she continued to talk to the other ladies. She would slant her eyes our way, nod in our direction and point with her elbow. Basically, she did everything except point a finger at us.

I looked back at my husband who thought I was upset about something and was refusing to look at him as he spoke to me. He walked away from me for a minute. I looked him over to see if he had toilet paper stuck to the bottom of his shoe or his fly was open. Nope. Nothing there to see. I found no reason they’d be staring at him, so I examined myself. I’m always dressed modestly, so I had no body parts playing peek-a-boo, no spilled ketchup running down my shirt, nothing on my face, and my hair wasn’t sticking up in an odd Something About Mary way.

My husband came back to where I stood and we spoke for a little longer. I glanced over his should a few more times and then it hit me! Bad memories…Not my memories though. I thought about the horrible stories about kids making fun of other kids, bullying and such 😦 I’ll admit that when I was in school I had my fair share of insecurities, but I was never bullied at this school over them. In fact, at this school, every kid is just…a kid. There were a few small “clicks”, but not very many and even the people in those groups were nice to the other kids. It really is a great school as far as that goes. Everyone is accepted.

I tried to tell myself that I was inventing something that wasn’t there. But…I just couldn’t shake the feeling that there truly was 😦

It was at that time that I lost my temper and knew that I needed to exit the facility in order not to embarrass my children. Afterall, X is going into his senior year and I don’t want to ruin that for him. You see, when I lose my temper (which is an extremely very rare occasion), people part from me like the parting of the Red Sea. I am not very pretty when I blow up which is why I have managed my anger very well through behavior modification. I pray and leave the situation quickly.

After much prayer last night, I found peace. I’ve decided that I will be seeing these women on a regular basis now and that I need to at least find out there names. As the school year goes along, I will also find out why they were staring at us also. I’m just blunt like that πŸ™‚

Don’t be Afraid of PCS

Don’t be Afraid of PCS! At first, I was very scared when I realized I didn’t know or remember:
– so many people that said they knew me
– things people would talk about and assume I followed along
– recognizing the things that make me …ME!
But, after about a week, I realized (minus the headaches), that whacking my head was a blessing in disguise, therefore Don’t be Afraid of PCS! Another Adventure in the making!!

The extreme tiredness was a great way to slow me down. I’m always on the go, always mentally stimulated, or otherwise engaged in something that’s more important to me than resting. Granted, almost falling asleep while driving was bad…but that’s when I, litttle miss Independent, gave the keys to my friend. I slept like a narcalleptic, any where – any time. My body felt sooo rested.

After allowing myself to rest, my brain was able to shut down & reboot. God’s grace allowed memories to flood over me while I slept. I began to remember! πŸ™‚ The headaches increased in frequency & pain until I was forced to go see the nurses again on Thursday of last week. She spoke with my Dr’s nurse, who called some steroids in to the pharmacy for me to pick up. The steroids decreased the swelling on my brain & I began to be ME again!!Β  Yeah πŸ™‚

My boys were so happy I knew them, their sisters, my sister, and my grandbabies (except one). I slowly began to notice my current life circumstances in a grand revelation. I had some work to do to my home & needed to get a grip on life once more. Ah, Don’t be Afraid of PCS!

There are still times when I can’t finish a thought, when my brain freezes, but a silver lining appears. Women should not always speak in such grand colorful detail anyway, or lose their audience as well as their own pattern of thought. If someone interrupts me when I’m speaking, I make note of who they are (because I’m forming new opinions of people now unable to remember the old opinions I had) & neglect to finish my own story. I’ve decided less is more. πŸ™‚Β 

Another bright side of PCS – THE HEADACHES. I’m being completely honest. Not that I enjoy pain, but because I cannot allow my brain to become too full, stressed, or busy- or else the headache pain vibrates through my skull leading me to drop to my knees in pain. So, I avoid noise, stress when possible, & raising my voice.

Slowing down in life has allowed me to notice the small things again that I use to LIVE for daily.
Ahhhhh, It’s all good. Don’t be Afraid of PCS!

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